Proverbs 22:6: Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
A familiar verse I’ve heard, read, and said many times over the years, and I’ve heard folks argue about its meaning.
But when I read this verse yesterday, it was as though I’d read it for the first time.
I began reading, “Train up a child in the way he should go,” and then immediately my eyes went back to the first word: train.
I don’t know about you, but sadly, I’m lacking here. Taking care of my children? I got that! I read the Bible with them, prepare their meals, buy clothes, give them hugs, tell them I love them, even home school them! I taught them how to read!
So how did I miss this?
Feeling the tug to the very first word in this verse stung.
Have you ever trained for something? It’s hard work! It can even be difficult! It requires pushing through the difficulty and struggles, remaining focused on the goal.
Train: Teach (a person or animal) a particular skill or type of behavior through practice and instruction over a period of time.
There’s a difference between training children and taking care of them. While they both take work, training them is going to take more effort and more time on my part. More time? Yes!
I sometimes wonder if we, as a culture, have become so dependent or involved in activities and various groups that it’s simply accepted that someone else does the training. All we have to do is get them there.
When I only had preschoolers, it was an understood among many friends in my mom’s group that we were ministering to our children during this season of life. But when they were old enough for Kindergarten, they could go to school full-time, and we could even get our lives back. And if a mother decided not to follow this route, she was a radical!Β Or possibly a weirdo! Definitely a freak of nature!
A couple of years ago, a young mama asked, “Do you ever get ‘me time’ or time for your ‘own life’?” I was happy when my first thought was, “But this is my time! This is my own life!” After following the crowd for so long, I felt I’d found contentment!
Over the years, we’ve gradually made changes for training our children and relying less on others to do it. But I’m still learning, as accepting this responsibility as a mother is being laid on my heart.
Since I’m continuing to learn, please share ways you’re “training up” your children. I’d love to read them!
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Megan says
LOVE it! I enjoy time with my children as well… not always looking for a “night out” or “time away”. Even so, I need to spen more time purposfully traning them.
We are blessed to be mommas and get to encourage and teach our children daily!
God bless you… keep up the good work!
Found your blog via Growing Home.
~Megan
http://www.increasemyhunger.blogspot.com
A Mama's Story says
Thanks for visiting and sharing, Megan. π
Ashley Ditto says
Wonderful post!
A Mama's Story says
Thanks, Ashley!! Lovely to see you here! π
rnewton says
I enjoy spending time with my kiddos reading books- esp. the Jesus Storybook Bible, and memorizing verses with my daughter. My kids are still very young- so most of the time is spent playing- that creates plenty of opportunities to teach about sharing and dealing with frustration. It is amazing how when I am teaching my children I frequently think-Mom needs to work on that too! π
A Mama's Story says
Well said, rnewton!
Keri at Growing in His Glory says
You are so right! Training is hard work! We train ours by reading Bible stories and memorizing scriptures.
I agree that many moms I know are eager for their kids to start school so they can be “released” of much of their responsibility. But they are our children, not their teachers, and require constant work on our parts if we want them to become Godly sons and daughters.
Look forward to your future posts. Found you on Raising Homemakers.
Keri
https://www.growinginhisglory.com
Kathy says
I agree that training is very difficult and takes commitment because I’ve trained for two half marathons and am currently training for my second triathlon.
Likewise, I think it definitely takes intentional planning and thought as to how to train our children. The most important is knowing the end goal. Knowing this in physical races is what kept me motivated and focused to complete my training, and stick with it even when I didn’t feel like it. Also, I think I need to know what specifically I am trying to accomplish with my children, all together and individually.
There are some books that have really helped me in this area: Shepherding a Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp, Don’t Make Me Count to Three by Ginger Plowman, and Teach Them Diligently by Lou Priolo.
Thanks!
Kathy christianbookmom.blogspot.com
Kasey @ TFOMplus2 says
The good stuff is worth the effort! I find myself drained and invigorated at the same time so often and I know it is because as I give of myself, He refills me to keep giving! Bless you, friend, as we keep training together!
A Mama's Story says
Keri! Thanks for visiting and how right you are!! π
A Mama's Story says
Kathy, thanks for the book suggestions! I have a couple of them and always on the lookout for new things to read. π
A Mama's Story says
Kasey! So good to see you!!! Your words remind me of Luke 17:33.
Mrs. Settles says
That word “train” has recently convicted me as well. I think we’ve grown so accustomed to “quick fixes” and convenience everything that we expect raising children to be as effortless.
Thanks for sharing!
Marcia
Shannie says
WOW, amazingly said! I have had a burden as well for this subject. I have been a birth doula for 13 years, Apprentice Homebirth Midwife for the past four. I homeschool my girls all four of them. Training is hard, when I feel like “we” are getting somewhere it seems we go back steps. The key is to stay focused on the things of the Lord and not this world. I have to daily remind my girls why we are living this life. Thank you for sharing. Found you on Pinterest while looking for Midwifery items.
Leeanna says
Thank you for this post! I have a 7 year old, a 2 year old and a 5 month old and I homeschool! My husband tells me all the time how I take care of my kids so much, and don’t be disheartened! I always feel like something is missing and after reading this I realize it’s the training of their hearts I don’t make a focus, and now pinpointed what the Spirit has been trying to show me ! My kids aren’t going to remember the organic breakfast I have every morning, they will remember the way I talked to them, guided their hearts and trained them. Sometimes we get our mom priorities off balanced!! We are implementing the teaching in Shepherding A Child’s Heart so that is where I am now. Also I am trying to make better relationships with Mothers that are godly examples and who are working towards the same goals as I am, that really encourages me !! Thank you again for your wonderful post, I will continue to follow- but found you through Raising Homemakers!!
April says
As moms, we have to remember to take care of ourselves too. There’s a reason flight attendants tell passengers to put on their oxygen masks FIRST before assisting children. If we as moms are feeling burned out, or overwhelmed, I don’t think we should feel guilty about needing some “me” time. Society puts so much pressure on moms to get everything done right, the first time, and oh yea…it should’ve been done yesterday!
I wholeheartedly agree that it is our responsibility to train our children, and not leave it to schools, Sunday school classes, etc. That being said, we must ensure that training our littles doesn’t become all-consuming. Just my two cents π
jossy says
You are right train up a child requires time and energy. One has to be dedicated to this course. It is a course God takes us through. For me I down tools when they are on vacation. I spend time with them teaching them the word. We study together and sit down to discuss what we studied. As mothers along side with the father it is a time you unteach every wrong things they have learn in school. I have teenagers who can easily be influenced by their mates. They believe what they tell them, that is why in training we become their true and trusted friend.