Are you a perfectionist? Do you think that everyone has it together but you? I certainly feel that way sometimes.
I often feel that other women keep cleaner, more organized homes; prepare better meals; always neatly press their children’s clothes instead of tossing a wrinkled item back into the dryer before putting it back on their child; keep up with their homeschool load so that they’re not behind, and are never, ever, ever late for anything.
As a perfectionist, I tend to attach how well I carry out these daily tasks and responsibilities to my value as a person. If my kitchen is buried under dishes, the breakfast plates and bowls are still on the table when lunch time comes around, and I realize that I forgot to take the clothes out of the washing machine after yesterday’s run (or maybe it was two days ago?), I immediately begin to feel guilt, wondering how on earth could someone such as I be used by God?
When I first saw the title Confessions of a Raging Perfectionist: Learning to be Free, I wondered if it would encourage or inspire me, because I’ve read many books on struggling with perfectionism and each time finished the book feeling worse—as though they were only reminding me again that keeping order equals a happy home, and I was failing. While I’ve made improvements with each child—after my fourth, I had to learn to let go and realize that not everything in within my control, I still struggle.
What impact did this book have on me?
If not for the little ones who needed my attention, I would’ve read the entire book in a day! While the mom’s lifestyle isn’t exactly like mine, she’s a mom writing from her heart. She’s very real sharing her struggles, holding herself to a high standard. Most important, though, is that by the end of the book, I realized that my worth in God’s eyes is not tied to how often I vacuumed my home this week. It’s not even tied to my children wearing matching outfits (I used to tire myself out getting all of my children coordinated—now I reserve this feat for Christmas pictures) or if we finished every single homeschool project this week.
Covering topics such as parenting (even parenting a special needs child), marriage, finances, personal health, even Diet Coke, I think she touches on just about every topic that the average woman can relate to in some way, even if the reader doesn’t identify as a perfectionist.
The end result? I wasn’t 100% transformed overnight, but I have no doubt that I’m finally on the road to being free! Thanks to the author for being brave enough to open her heart and to Tyndale for providing a copy for review.
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oooh thank you for the recommendation! Adding this one to my to-read list!
Sounds like a good read. As women we often have very high expectations of ourselves. I heard one author (Julie Savage) say that we often compare our inner struggles to some else’s outside appearance.
God has given us families to love and guide. May God bless your family!
Wonderful review. Thanks for sharing it.
Thanks for linking up at Family Fun Friday at https://happyandblessedhome.com!
Totally loved reading this book myself. It’s a great read. Thanks for sharing your review on Titus 2 Tuesday. Hope to see you again this week!
I’ve never read the book but I do tend to be a bit of a perfectionist. My oldest son is one too. When he was in high school I told him that he needed to learn how to fail. Because he got ONE problem wrong on his math lesson and it really upset him. One problem! But it wasn’t a “perfect” paper. (I also told him that most people would be thrilled to have just one wrong, lol!)
Thanks for linking up to “Making Your Home Sing Monday!”